He subsequently starts to assess himself, contemplating the fact that life is truly about compromise for all along, he was weak, and lived by the belief of 'letting himself get hurt rather than others', which is the reason why his mother suffered so much. As the guilt eats at him, he envisions the people in his life he either lost or might lose due to his self perceived weakness.
Kaneki retreats back into his mind-scape where he is wracked with guilt. He is unable to choose and offers himself instead, causing Yamori to kill the both of them in a fit of rage. He places Shuu and Haru in front of him bound and gagged and demands Kaneki choose which one to spare. As Kaneki breaks further from the torture and the hallucinations, Yamori devises another method to break him. Kanou's intention to turn Kaneki into a ghoul, and uses the new regenerative abilities to break him, eventually leading to him forcing a centipede down Kaneki's ear. In between, Yamori forces Kaneki to count backwards from 1000 by 7 as a coping mechanism in order to retain Kaneki's failing sanity.
Afterwards, his only source of comfort for a long time is Hide. She eventually overworked herself to death, leaving Kaneki alone. Kaneki a single mother working two jobs and supporting her older sister. Kaneki's father had died years prior, leaving Mrs. He recalls his childhood where he watched his mother overwork herself. While enduring even more unbearable torture, Ken Kaneki passes through several illusions monitored by a manifestation of Rize Kamishiro.
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